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Tuesday, December 9th, 2008
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So although it’s only the beginning of December, I found myself sitting in my placement the other day reflecting on this past year. I couldn’t believe that this year was going to be over so soon. It honestly feels like January was just yesterday. I look back and think of all the things that have gone down this past year and I can only just sit here and be like “wow”. This year, as like most years, has had its ups and has had its downs. My life had many high points and low moments. I felt like writing this would have been a type of release therapy. Letting out everything one last time. So here is my reflection on this past year...
( my life's like a circus )
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(2 MADE CONTROVERSY! | MAKE CONTROVERSY!)
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Tuesday, October 21st, 2008
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There’s only so many songs that I can sing to pass the time
And I’m running out of things to do to get you off my mind
All I have is this picture in a frame
that I hold close to see your face everyday
With you is where I’d rather be
but we’re stuck where we are
It’s so hard, you’re so far
This long distance is killing me
I wish that you are here with me
but we’re stuck where we are
it’s so hard, you’re so far
This long distance is killing me
It’s so hard, it’s so hard, where we are, where we are, you’re so far
This long distance is killing me
It’s so hard, it’s so hard, where we are, where we are, you’re so far
This long distance is killing me
Now the minutes feel like hours
and the hours feel like days
While I’m away
You know right now I can’t be home
But I’m coming home soon
Coming home soon
All I have is this picture in a frame
that I hold close to see your face everyday
With you is where i’d rather be
but we’re stuck where we are
It’s so hard, you’re so far
This long distance is killing me
I wish that you are here with me
but we’re stuck where we are
It’s so hard, you’re so far
Can you hear me crying?
Ooh (oh-oh oh-oh)
Can you hear me crying?
Ooh (oh-oh oh-oh)
Can you hear me crying?
Ooh (oh-oh oh-oh)
Ooh woo whoa (oh-oh ah)
With you is where i’d rather be (where I’d rather be..) whoa
(but we’re stuck where we are) oh
(it’s so hard) So hard (your so far), so far
(this long distance is killing me) This long distance is killing me
I wish that you are here with me (you are here with me) me
(but we’re stuck where we are) Stuck where we are! So hard! So far
This long distance is killing me
It’s so hard, it’s so hard, where we are, where we are, you’re so far
This long distance is killing me
It’s so hard, it’s so hard, where we are, where we are, you’re so far
(so hard, so hard, where we are, where we are, your so far)
This long distance is killing me
There’s only so many songs that I can sing to pass the time
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( MAKE CONTROVERSY!)
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Thursday, July 10th, 2008
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i was three feet from the floor
gasping for air
trying to release my father's hands from my throat
i looked into his eyes
and wondered, if my feet would ever touch the floor again
have you ever been hit so hard, that is sends your body flying across the room?
we all fall to the floor at some point
its how you pick yourself up
thats the real challenge
isn't it?
i've always lived in my own world
trying to escape my troubles
but i've learned
that there's light even in the darkest places
i can't blame my father for anything
your can't rely on other people to make you happy
but i know deep down inside
that he loved me
...
...heard that & thought it was amazing.
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( MAKE CONTROVERSY!)
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it was a lot of fun going to the zoo. all the animals. the thunderstorm. the tornado. the ZOOmobile. the many pictures. AND i even got to pet some sting rays!! Yes HA how many people can say they've done that! lol can't wait to go again.... next summer, when the polar bears make there return.
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( MAKE CONTROVERSY!)
| Time: | 5:04 am. |
| Mood: |  depressed. |
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how can one nightmare, bring back such awful memories to a person.
somethings just never go away and live with you forever.
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( MAKE CONTROVERSY!)
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Tuesday, March 25th, 2008
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You'll be fine tomorrow
The sun will rise again
It's never easy to say goodbye
You know I'll always love you
You know I always will
Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye
My old friend (my old friend)
Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye
We've reached the end (we've reached the end)
I don't cry for sorrow, I cry with joy
The memories we've made can't be destroyed
You know I won't forget you
You know I never could
And when I say I loved you
You know I meant for good
You know I'll always love you
Goodbye
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( MAKE CONTROVERSY!)
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Saturday, March 15th, 2008
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So yesterday I was on the bus with my friend Roxana and we were our way to the Science Center (which was was so much fun) when I get a phone call around 12:30pm from my brothers wife. She told me that her water broke and she would be having the baby soon.
Such exciting news!
So after my day at the Science Center, I rushed back home, ate and got ready as my and my family left to go to the hospital. We got to the hospital around 9pm and then it was a wait.
But everything was worth the wait.
At 1:07AM on March 15th, 2008
Weighing 7lbs6oz & 22 inches
Sierra Marie was BORN
A day I will never forget.
And whatever I've been going through and with whatever drama is going on in my life, doesn't matter to me anymore. I could care less. This new life means the world to me. She's someone I can love and someone I want to care for.
A precious life can change so much. And gives you a new perspective on life.
We didn't get back home until like 3 in the morning, and we'll be going back and forth to the hospital all weekend. But that's all I wanted to share.
...A Memory That Will Never Be Forgotten.
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(4 MADE CONTROVERSY! | MAKE CONTROVERSY!)
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Wednesday, March 12th, 2008
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Cause we all just wanna be big rockstars
And live in hilltop houses driving fifteen cars
The girls come easy and the drugs come cheap
We'll all stay skinny cause we just won't eat
And we'll hang out in the coolest bars
In the VIP with the movie stars
Every good gold digger
Gonna wind up there
Every Playboy bunny
With her bleach blond hair
Hey hey I wanna be a rockstar
Hey hey I wanna be a rockstar
<33 Daniella & Andrew.
LE'EEEEEEERRRRRRRRRKKKKKKKKKZZZZZZZ!!!
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( MAKE CONTROVERSY!)
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Friday, February 22nd, 2008
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Monday, January 21st, 2008
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i feel like i want to write out something here, just to vent about everything, but i cant. i don't know where or how to start.
definitions of trust:
have confidence or faith in.
reliance.
believing in the honesty and reliability of others.
turst is something i've lost with so many people.
i dont know who i can trust anymore.
nor do i know someone who will actually listen and help.
...i think im getting more and more use to being alone.
goodbye.
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(5 MADE CONTROVERSY! | MAKE CONTROVERSY!)
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Saturday, November 10th, 2007
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So I just wanted to type. I just wanted to clear my head and my thoughts. This always happens… everytime I have time to my self and my thoughts, it just puts me in a bad mood. I feel that I have a lot on my mind. I feel like this year was just a year that I went through a lot. It was a year I turned to other things to help cover up any pain I was going through. I was just on LiveJournal and I went back into my history on there, and it just saddens me that I wont get back some of those people, some of those days, some of those feelings and everything. Ugh my thoughts are just all over the place. I know I wont get back those memories, but just thinking of them makes me sad. I’ve had some happy moments this year, but the down & sad moments over power the happy ones. Its been one year since I met someone. Someone, who one year ago, I really liked. Someone who I now barley talk to. It was something that just didn’t work out. It was something that made me so happy, yet so hurt. I think the fact that I thought it was going so well, I just wanted it to work so badly. I wont get that back. Regarding this year I feel out of control. I feel lost. I feel that as I type this I don’t even know where this is going. I want to set some serious goals for the 2008 year. I want to take control of my life and make more positive decisions. I don’t even really know what else I want to say. I sit in bed as I type this wondering what to type next. I just wanted to type out something to help me clear my head. I’m enjoying college. I love my new friends. I still have issues in my personal life that I want to sort out, but I guess that’ll take some time. Well that’s the end of my little rant. Bye.
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(1 MADE CONTROVERSY! | MAKE CONTROVERSY!)
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Monday, October 22nd, 2007
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| Time: | 8:04 pm. |
| Mood: |  ecstatic. | | Music: | spice girls. |
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SO ITS BEEN SUCH AN AMAZING DAY!
I LOVE IT!
THE SPICE GIRLS ARE COMING TO TORONTO!
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( MAKE CONTROVERSY!)
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Thursday, July 12th, 2007
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Maybe - Kelly Clarkson
(My December)
I'm strong
But I break
I'm stubborn
And I make plenty of mistakes
Yeah I'm hard
And life with me is never easy
To figure out, to love
I'm jaded but oh so lovely
All you have to do is hold me
And you'll know and you'll see just how sweet it can be
If you'll trust me, love me, let me
Maybe, maybe Someday
When we're at the same place
When we're on the same road
When it's okay to hold my hand
Without feeling lost
Without all the excuses
When it's just because you love me, you let me, you need me
Then maybe, maybe
All you have to do is hold me
And you'll know and you'll see just how sweet it can be
If you'll trust me, love me, let me
Maybe, maybe I'm confusing as hell
I'm north and south
And I'll probably never have it all figured out
But what I know is I wasn't meant to walk this world without you
And I promise I'll try
Yeah I'm gonna try to give you every little part of me
Every single detail you missed with your eyes
Then maybe
Maybe, yeah maybe One day
We'll meet again and you'll need me, you'll see me completely
Every little bit
Oh yeah maybe you'll love me, you'll love me then I don't want to be tough
And I don't want to be proud
I don't need to be fixed and I certainly don't need to be found
I'm not lost
I need to be loved
I just need to be loved
I just want to be loved by you and I won't stop 'cause I believe
That maybe, yeah maybe
Maybe, yeah maybe I should know better than to touch the fire twice
But I'm thinking maybe, yeah maybe you might Maybe, love maybe
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( MAKE CONTROVERSY!)
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Tuesday, April 24th, 2007
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Thursday April 26:
- Food & Nutrition Test
- Drama Presentation
Friday April 27:
- Indaviduals & Families Phase 4
Tuesday May 1:
- COMFIRM COLLEGE ACCECPTANCES!!!
- English Assigments
Thursday May 3:
- Challenge & Change in Society ISU Essay
Firday May 4:
- Food & Nutrition ISU Part B
Wednesday May 9:
- Environmental In-Class Issue Analysis
Tuesday May 15:
- Indaviduals & Families Phase 5 + rest of ISU
- English "Leaving Home" Assignment
Friday May 18:
- General Science ISU Essay
- General Science ISU Presentation
Monday May 21:
- NO SCHOOL!!!
Tuesday May 22:
- Ennglish ISU Part A
Thursday May 24:
- Environmental Market-Place Presentation
Friday May 25:
- PROM!!!
Monday May 28:
- Indaviduals & Families Presentation
Tuesday May 29
-- Food & Nutrition ISU Presentation
Wednesday May 30:
- Challenge & Change in Society Seminar
- Environmental Term Test
Friday June 1:
- Grad Buffet! SKIT!
- ABC's Athletic Banquet
Monday June 4:
- Drama 3 Page Portfolio
Tuesday June 5:
- English ISU Part B
Friday June 8:
- Drama Acting Challenge
- Drama Group Performance
Tuesday June 12:
- Drama Indavidual Performance
Wednesdat June 13:
- English ISU Part C
Tuesday June 19:
- General Science EXAM!
DONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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(2 MADE CONTROVERSY! | MAKE CONTROVERSY!)
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Hey...
...wow i haven't written on here in a while. amazing how facebook can just consume someone.
anyways this years march break will be pretty much over soon, so i thought i'd do a little march break run down.
Surprisingly i didn't even do that much. my weekends are usually amazing, but the hoildays suck lol except for like Christmas cause the gifts make up for that. so here's my little march break break-down:
March 10th...Friday...
- party downtown.
- vodka & redbull was interesting.
March 11th...Saturday...
- another party downtown.
- reached my cousin ashely's house.
- bedtime rave music haha lol shower rave music.
March 12th...Sunday....
- d.e.l.i.c.i.o.u.s. breakfast.
- chilled at ashley's house.
- cartwheels and the indian thriller.
- tim hortons cream cheese bagle.
March 13th...Monday...
- sleepover with me and ashley at my house.
- buying stupidness at the dollar store.
- SAW III (scary shit).
- Happy Birthday Linda & Kristina <3
March 14th...Tuesday...
- Happy Birthday Richie <3
- stayed home.
March 15th...Wednesday...
- stayed home for most of the day.
- richie & nicole came over.
- went to Pickering Town Center at night.
- got hair cut there.
March 16th...Thursday...
- i thought this would of been the best day, turned out to almost be like the worst.
- went to get my Pass-Port picture taken, came out iite.
- went to Markville Mall. saw something in American Egal that i really wanted, parents wouldnt get it for me.
- so pissed off after (much more to the story so dont think i'm like a little bitch cause i didnt get what i wanted lol).
- went to P.Mall to get two new PS2 games.
- played the games.
- my cousin ashley came back over to my house to play them with me.
- buessed down to my cousins house downtown.
- sleepover there.
- finished my hours lol thanks to my aunt <3.
- FINALLY SAW ME AND MY COUSIN ANDREW IN THE MOVIE TAKE THE LEAD!!!!!!! THIS MADE MY DAY, TO SEE US ON TV IN A MOVIE! =D
- bedtime: 5:00AM
March 17th...Friday...
- chilled day at my cousins house.
- little party.
- tattoo talks.
- POSSIBLY GETTING A "RECORD DEAL". My cousin Ashley's bf is a up-and-coming music producer and has already been working on tacks with people.
- taken to mcdonalds drive thu.
- DIDN'T FALL ASLEEP TIL 5 IN THE MORNING!!!!
March 18th...Saturday...
- chilled at home.
- went to Pho's with Roxana, Linda, Rebecca & two of their co-workers.
- was fun and very filling.
- After Phos Photoshoot with Roxana @ my place.
- rented The Return & The Grudge 2; Sarah Michelle Geller movie night.
- watched The Return; was an interesting/ok movie.
- my cousin and aunt came and sleptover.
March 19th...Sunday...
- hung out with my little sister & my cousin Shane.
- grilled cheese.
- singing out loud!
- just finished watching The Grudge 2; it was kinda confusing.
- now i'm chilling on the computer, talking to Andrew on the phone.
- new soca 2007 songs from Andrew haha lol.
- still have to study for my Food & Nutrition Carbs. Test; which is tomorrow.
So it's back to school tomorrow.
Spare first period - thank god.
And it's GoodBye to March Break!
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(2 MADE CONTROVERSY! | MAKE CONTROVERSY!)
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Monday, February 26th, 2007
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"You just have to go after what you want and if it doesn’t want you back then so be it, it doesn’t deserve you anyways."
- Nicole Richie.
best quote. i love it.
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( MAKE CONTROVERSY!)
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Thursday, February 22nd, 2007
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and the oc is done.
such an amazing show from start to finish.
and this esp. was a perfect way to end it all.
was a very good closure for the show.
i have the first three seasons on dvd and will spend all the $80 for the last one.
so going to miss this show =(
<3 the oc.
bye...
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(1 MADE CONTROVERSY! | MAKE CONTROVERSY!)
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Wednesday, February 7th, 2007
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Flawed Design (Remix) - Stabilo
When I was a young boy
I was honest and I had more self-control
If I was tempted I would run
Then, when I got older
I began to lie to get exactly what I wanted
When I wanted it
- And I wanted it
Now, I'm having trouble differentiating
Between what I want
And what I need
To make me happy
So instead of thinking I just act
Before I have the chance to contemplate the
Consequences of action
Bridge:
And I will turn off
And I will shut down
The chemicals are restless in my head
Chorus:
'Cuz I lie
Not because I want to
But I seem to need to
All the time
Yeah, I lie
And I don't even know it
Maybe this is
All a part of my
flawed design
And ever since I figured out
That I could control other people
I've had trouble sleeping
With both eyes closed
And if I asked permission
If I make sure it's ok
I promise I won't slip up this time
You can trust me
But never take advice from someone
Who just admitted to being devious
Who just confessed to treason
And I would also never ask a question
That I cannot ask myself
For it might
Dirty up your conscience
Chorus:
'Cuz I lie
Not because I want to
But I seem to need to
All the time
Yeah, I lie
And I don't even know it
Maybe this is
All a part of my –
Bridge:
And I will turn off
And I will shut down
Burying the voices of my conscience hitting ground
And I will turn off
And I will shut down
The chemicals are restless in my head
Chorus:
'Cuz I lie
Not because I want to
But I seem to need to
All the time
Yeah, I lie
And I don't even know it
Maybe this is
All a part of my -
'Cuz I lie
And if I could control it
Maybe I could leave it all behind
Yeah, I lie
And I don't even know it
Maybe this is all a part of my
Flawed design
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( MAKE CONTROVERSY!)
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sex_controversy's journal
accomplished.
stressed.